don't call me no mo' - don't text me no mo'

♪♪ don't call me no mo' - don't text me no mo' ♪♪

"cuz i'm through whicha - cuz i'm through whica"

are they kidding? LOL

if this is the NEW song - then please someone hand over a pen and a piece of paper QUICKLY and let me jot down a little DITTY for you!!!!

toooooooooooooooooooooooo funny (or maybe sad?) LOL

rambles

rambles

here is my shnookums, he is now 1 and i just can not believe how the time flies. this picture was on his first birthday a few weeks ago - after the cake- waiting patiently for mommy to clean him up. he is just SO beautiful. i love everything about him, i can't even pick just one thing.....it is just not possible. everyday he changes, i catch myself just sitting and watching him for hours - and he doesn't even know what i am doing. he is amazing to me - he is like a sponge and is learning something every minute of every day. i had no idea it was possible to love someone THIS much - no matter how cranky he gets (which is rare for him) no matter how many times he pulls my hair or yanks my earrings out (ha) - i can't even remember much of my life before i had him - i mean i can - but it seems so long ago now- and i wonder- why had i not had him sooner? boy was i missing out! :o) he was so much fun at his birthday, half the time not even knowing what was going on and other times very intrigued by what was going on....

my gf said looking at her daughter everyday was like the very first day the doctor put her daughter in her arms for the very first time.....and i can so relate to what she was saying.....

every morning is like Christmas with shnookums, awaking to see the new surprises of the day- and enjoying every minute i have with him....i truly cherish him and our time together. when i get off work i can't seem to go pick him up at daycare fast enough, i miss him SOOOO much throughout the day.

i thank God everyday all day for this wonderful child he graciously blessed me with.....there is truly nothing BETTER in this world than being his MOMMY.

enjoy some birthday pics.....

my baby is ONE today!

my baby is ONE today!

wow.....i feel so emotional today, ha. he is 1.....he is a whole year old now (technically he will be a whole year at 10:07 PM tonight) i woke him up this morning singing Happy Birthday - he was so cute he was just smiling and laughing at me. i was watching him sleep last night, he looks like a little person.....not my teeny tiny newborn baby.....and after all this time, he still looks peaceful and happy, so innocent.....i pray he will always be so happy and peaceful and that if he has to lose that innocence (which of course he will) that is happens gracefully. :o)

i got him a little cake and a little present for tonight - just me and him. :o) and i got a big ONE candle to put on the cake. i am going to leave or my lunch break here soon and go get him some of those teeny tiny cupcakes for school and a couple balloons. i know he really doesn't know what is going on.....but I do! :o)

i decided he and I will have a birthday tradition. at 10:07 PM on his birthday he will always get a special gift. :o) as he gets older, it will be the one BIG item that he REALLY wants for his birthday :o) tonight it will just be my little gift to him. :o)
and i have a sneaky suspicion that he will have two birthdays anyway - ha. one with Mommy and the other with Grammy and Papa and family. i mean how exciting - several days of presents is always nice!

we are having his actual birthday PARTY this Saturday and Grammy & Papa's house - so much fun. i really hope the turn out is nice - lots of pictures to put in his baby book and time capsule i am making for him.

as i sit here......i just can not believe a whole year has gone by with this little dude.....i am just amazed at how much he has grown, how much he has changed, and how much he has learned and is still learning.....mommyhood has been so wonderful so far....i constantly look forward to what is next with shnookums....

just 4 more days

just 4 more days

omg! shnookums is going to be a YEAR OLD in 4 days!! i seriously can not believe it.

i spent the past two evenings going through his clothes for the 5th time. i have already given away two humongous bags of his clothes that i could actually part with and not get all emotional about, well kinda....sort of. (yes people, giving away his teeny tiny clothes makes me sad....lol)

as of last night i had 2 more great big bags of clothes that he can no longer wear - i swear i could have my own little baby boy's clothing store with what this little dude had stored away in my closets (yes closets is plural). not to mention all my little teeny tiny pairs of teeny tiny shoes....sigh. and this doesn't even count the big bag of stuff i said i was saving.......whew.

okay, i am snapping out of it.

any how - he is going to be 1 which means i have been post preggy for a YEAR and I still haven't lost any weight. sigh. i know everyone tells me to not harp on it....but it is driving me bananas. i tell you i still feel like the skinny girl i used to be - only a mere 2 years ago....but then i look in the mirror or run out of breath carrying shnookums and the world back and forth when we are out running around etc....and i am reminded----the skinny ME is on vaca. double sigh.
ummmmm hummmmm.....before preggy.....yep - i heard you sigh too. now you know what i am saying? one day i keep telling myself.......ONE DAY........hopefully SOON. i am giving myself to Christmas to get back to a single digit size clothing. at least lose 40lbs....even 30lbs i would feel much better.

okay enough about weight - - back to my babe. :o)

yes, he is becoming such a little man. and to think while i was pregnant i was always trying to imagine becoming a mother and what he would like, and how would it be when i first met him.....well first meeting him was BLISS and totally indescribable. i have said it a 1000 times - i never knew a love like this existed. no matter what kind of day i have - when i see him - it makes me smile and happy and i just want to kiss him all over and make sure he is happy and LOVED.
this was me falling in love. just about to pop - i had to take some pics of my beautiful growing belly with my wonderful blessing growing inside. i can actually say - even with all the "issues" i had while preggy - it was one of the best times of my life - ever! the other time? giving birth to shnookums and holding him and loving him intimately for the very first time.

and here we are......here he is......about to turn 1 years old. he will be an actual number now....not just a week or a month. :o) how exciting - and yet EMOTIONAL. my birthday wish for him is this.....I pray he knows he is LOVED, GODLY, that he is HAPPY, STRONG, HEALTHY, INTELLIGENT, SWEET, RESPECTFUL, SUCCESSFUL, THAT HE CAN DO ANYTHING HE PUTS HIS MIND TO, SAFE, COMFORTABLE, INFINITE BLESSINGS, and just HAPPY.....HAPPY.....HAPPY.....HAPPY.....HAPPY.....etc. and i pray that AB takes NOTICE of him and stops holding grudges, that is heart opens and he finds the love this little boy deserves.

XOXOXOXO PEACE FORWARD ALL!! XOXOXOXO

i can't believe it

i can't believe it

i know it has been a good minute (or two) since i have posted anything on my lovely blog here - so much for trying to do it weekly (ugh) ever since i moved into this new department at work i haven't had a moment to breath much less write in a blog (smile) but i love that it has been keeping me super busy - makes the day go by sooooo much faster - as where as before it DRAGGED. and you can forget about trying to blog once i get home with shnookums at the end of the day - mr. busy body just won't have any of that. it is all about him, which frankly i have no problem with at all. he is growing way way too fast - i can't believe it- he will be ONE people.....ONE in 13 days!!!!!! i swear to you i was pregnant a WHOLE LOT LONGER than it has taken him to reach his ONE YEAR celebration - seriously.

he is crawling up a storm (and pretty darn fast i might add) he pulls himself up on anything he possible can (my leg, couch, chairs, toys, tables, doorways, toilet seat) and i promise you i have seen that little rascle stand up solo in the middle of the room too with this 'you just wait mommy mischevious grin' and then sit back down with this thoughtful look like 'oh yea, i am almost there - watch out world- here i come!' - - - - - - i am so not kidding. he talks a mile a minute too, babbling jarbled baby talk, but non the less - he is def a chatterbox and whatever he is saying i am sure it is pretty darn serious because he looks at mommy straight in the face and waits for me to respond with this serious look like 'you know what i am say n' mommy' - too funny.

he has become this teeny tiny little person right before my eyes, he is a HAPPY little boy and has sooooo much personality already, i think i have even seen a little bit of a TUDE (ha) wonder who he gets that from (eh HEM....) and he is now very particular about things - people-food-toys-bedtime (lol) waving bye bye- waving hello, clapping, dancing, singing, playing peek-a-boo, smiling at mommy when she says no-no and doing it anyway (something tells me the no-no thing is just the beginning of a lifelong thing - ha), posing for the camera (again no idea where he gets that stuff from...lol).....yet it seems like just yesterday i was anticipating his arrival and then welcoming him into my arms last September 10th for the very first time ever........now look......13 more days and he will be ONE!

we are having a wonderful little gathering for him September 15th - and i know they say the first birthday is more for the parents, and they are probably right (smile) but I am so excited about it, and shnookums is so observant that i already just know he is going to love it! he loves attention anyway (again no idea who he gets that from) wink. i am planning a time capsule for his first birthday - something full of wonderful memories from the people in his life right now as he turns a CELEBRATED BLESSED ONE YEAR OLD - so he can look back at it when he gets older and enjoy (mommy too).

and i am also celebrating being a MOMMY for a year....it has been an absolute collaboration of emotions and pure BLISS and JOY - it has had it's unsure moments with certain sicknesses etc....and daycare stuff....but it has been the time of my life, i would have never imagined this kind of love before i had shnookums - and for that i am truly BLESSED and GRATEFUL.

God just ROCKS! ;o)

well i am back to work, but i am going to try to do better at updating my blog.....TRY. (wink)

peace forward ~ infinite blessings!

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

so busy

so busy

I feel like one day here I will get back to blogging…..sigh and I started out so well too.
my goal was once a week and there for a minute I was actually blogging a couple times a week. it has been some time since my last blog – I started a new department once my manager came back from vaca – and this new department is no joke – busy busy and very detailed – a lot more little things to do than what I was doing before.
I have new pics of shnookums and pics from pickle juice’s visit – so I will get on that super soon….I hope my fellow blog readers have not forgotten me….I promise to start doing better with my blogging. I can say I have had a lot of emotions running through me lately – pertaining to shnookums (of course), my family, finances, work and God has been a very big part of it all…..I have had so much material bouncing around in my head for my poetry and no time to jot it all down….such a waste……well I know this wasn’t much – just a taste of me today – but more work has piled on top of the work I already had waiting on me…..

Peace Forward and Much Love…..Infinite Blessings!!!! xoxoxoxoxoxxo

busy

okay i have been absolutely swamped this week and last week- my manager is out of town on vacation and things have been bananas! i haven't had time to blog - but i wanted to letcha know i am still alive and breathing! so here is a poem a wrote a little while back - you might have read it before - but trust me i have probably tweaked it a few times since then....i just can't help myself.....lol....please enjoy and i will write an update later about life's happenins! i hope every one has a happy 4th of July (happy birthday Gina and China)!! we will be doing the FAM thing as usual - pickle juice and mel are in town - so we got to hang with them - OF COURSE! shnookums is fabulous as always - he is such a ham and what a cute little personality he has blooming!

until next blog.....Peace Forward and BE BLESSED! xoxxooxoxoxoxox

\/

WHO

who am I really = who are you = whose behind my conservative flesh = who hides behind your obvious smile = who dances naked in the dark behind closed but slightly cracked doors = I’ll let you watch for a little while = if you ask me = don’t ask me why I do this = keep those thoughts to yourself = I do this because I am autonomous = wide open language that interprets my many moods = my orthodox eyes hold many surreptitious whims that are without a doubt unknown to you = developed in me = do you babe and I will do me = my recuse of everyday moments leave me in a “I can’t wait for tomorrow” state of mind = my thoughts are legit in my skin = verified in my ability to write the word of my wants = my necessity to create origination in my innovation = a crease in a new sheet of paper = another wrinkle on my soul = where are yours = can you see me for me = or see me as I present me = how do you present you = do I even know you = peel away the layers of each of my characters individual outfits = buy a new coat to cover your true emotional validation = I carry my reputation in my mouth = can you hear it = don’t cover both your ears = you might miss what I am about = don't close your eyes and blink = you might lose sight of me = I could vanish quickly = my contemplated wonders sink deep into my chambers of complex features that edit my untold stories = I critique my completed paragraphs of unfinished replenished contraptions = I hold them for later = I share them in rations with you = with them = I swallow the crumbs of my leftovers and keep the digesting to myself = ramifications uphold artificial felicity in my handshake on life = misery loves company = not quite = take your tribulation somewhere else = don’t share the woe is me with me = I am not intrigued = engross my turned on mind of many infatuated situations I hand out in small doses = your waiting for another hit = I can see it = lay back and I will let you borrow it for a minute = or two = wrap my intelligence in your arms = embrace my mentality in your adopted grace of demureness = my shy humility is timid and reserved = don’t break it’s meekness protected by unbreakable walls = don’t hammer me = except me = question is can I except you for excepting me as I am = I sing while no one is listening = make up my own words of compliance melody out of pitch = a little off key = I am not a karaoke sistah wanna be = I am real = are you as real as me = or do you just pretend to be = can you shed your winter clothing and show me your birthday suit of who you were planned to fashion and walk the runway of this very planet = can you undergo this universe with me = participate in each taste of vulnerability that presents the undecided passages we eat = contemplations of identity rest on our tongues = waiting to be washed down with a glass of cold reality = we stuff ourselves full of bulimic purges until we are empty again = starting over = can you start over with me = can you touch me without physically touching me = kiss my passionate longings without disappointing me = will I disappoint you = can you drive my intellect stick shift stimulation with out crashing = can you stay by my side without passing or smashing into my un drama like visions I imprison without parole = don't cause me any drama man = do you think you can hang = can you strengthen my fait and exhilarate my soul without pushing me over the edge = who am I really = who are you = who hides behind my inviting smile = whose behind your conventional flesh = is this just a justification in protest of the quest to test us and confess...

© AEP 2006, 2007

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!!!

it's friday

friday finally

it’s Friday ….yay

I am a little under the weather today, I think I have a summer cold but I am so happy it is Friday what a wonderful thing to wake up too in the morning…..FRIDAY. LOL


wednesday mr. shnookums had his 9 month check up and he did wonderful! he is such a good baby and does so well for doctor C’Man, I am so proud of him. he now weighs 20 lbs even and is 28 and ¼ inches long and he is super healthy! he has learned a few things…he can clap on command, although I catch him clapping the side of his head and face sometimes….lol….his two bottom teeth have poked through the gums and he has two top teeth that haven’t poked through yet, but you can see that it will be any day now that they will be coming through as well. I swear it is THAT time again, I need to go buy the little one some more clothes….he is alrrady growing out of the summer clothes I got him a month or so back….they really do grow way too fast……I can’t believe he is already 9 months and 10 months isn’t too far around the corner….
I think this weekend we will just stay at home….we normally go see papa and grammy in “L”burg– but they have something they have to do on Saturday anyway.
me and shnookums are invited to michael p’s house for a little get together with some old old friends on Saturday, people I haven’t seen since I was the skinny – dancing- YOUNGER (lol) hip hop amy…..wow that seems like eons ago….it will be kind of cool to see some old faces…..


speaking of dancing, So You Think You Can Dance was on Wednesday night, OMG the talent on there is AMAZING….watching these kids dance is so awesome I get such a HIGH from just watching them and the choreography is out of this world….I am so happy they brought wade robson on as a regular choreographer, his style is bananas – I love him! mia micheals is my fav when it comes to contemporary dance – she too is a GENIUS…and let us not forget Shane Sparks he is fantastically fabulous when it comes to the street hip hop dances and next week they are having debbie allen!!! I can’t wait….I am so excited….I grew up watching FAME….I used to run and leap in the backyard singing….’Fame! I’m gonna love you forvever! Baby remember my name! Fame!’ do you remember debbie allen and her cane and she would bang it on the floor to get the dancers to stay on beat…..wow….so cool.
last night So You Think You Can Dance voted off faina and jimmy….so sad….I hate to see them cry....I so know how they feel….this year all the dancers are SO GOOD I don’t know how anyone could pick. my favorites at this moment are jessi, lacy, sabre and lauren, and for the guys I love kameron, pasha, dominic and of course hok. I really have to get back into dancing and get to losing some weight! :o)


any HOO….Sunday Bishop Drew Rouse is at our church and I can’t wait to hear what he has to say – he is fantastic, I love how he gets so excited when he is speaking…..he has already touched me with his words, prayers and blessings and I can not wait to see what is in store this time around. he will be here for Sunday morning service and then Monday and Tuesday evenings! I encourage any and everyone to come out and hear him!


Work has been really busy…..I think I have typed ‘efforts continue to complete objectives’ a thousand times in the past two days….whew…..


Hope everyone has a BLESSED and FABULOUS weekend! I will write more next week…..


Peace Forward…..Peace OUT……\/ two fingers!