rambles

rambles

here is my shnookums, he is now 1 and i just can not believe how the time flies. this picture was on his first birthday a few weeks ago - after the cake- waiting patiently for mommy to clean him up. he is just SO beautiful. i love everything about him, i can't even pick just one thing.....it is just not possible. everyday he changes, i catch myself just sitting and watching him for hours - and he doesn't even know what i am doing. he is amazing to me - he is like a sponge and is learning something every minute of every day. i had no idea it was possible to love someone THIS much - no matter how cranky he gets (which is rare for him) no matter how many times he pulls my hair or yanks my earrings out (ha) - i can't even remember much of my life before i had him - i mean i can - but it seems so long ago now- and i wonder- why had i not had him sooner? boy was i missing out! :o) he was so much fun at his birthday, half the time not even knowing what was going on and other times very intrigued by what was going on....

my gf said looking at her daughter everyday was like the very first day the doctor put her daughter in her arms for the very first time.....and i can so relate to what she was saying.....

every morning is like Christmas with shnookums, awaking to see the new surprises of the day- and enjoying every minute i have with him....i truly cherish him and our time together. when i get off work i can't seem to go pick him up at daycare fast enough, i miss him SOOOO much throughout the day.

i thank God everyday all day for this wonderful child he graciously blessed me with.....there is truly nothing BETTER in this world than being his MOMMY.

enjoy some birthday pics.....

my baby is ONE today!

my baby is ONE today!

wow.....i feel so emotional today, ha. he is 1.....he is a whole year old now (technically he will be a whole year at 10:07 PM tonight) i woke him up this morning singing Happy Birthday - he was so cute he was just smiling and laughing at me. i was watching him sleep last night, he looks like a little person.....not my teeny tiny newborn baby.....and after all this time, he still looks peaceful and happy, so innocent.....i pray he will always be so happy and peaceful and that if he has to lose that innocence (which of course he will) that is happens gracefully. :o)

i got him a little cake and a little present for tonight - just me and him. :o) and i got a big ONE candle to put on the cake. i am going to leave or my lunch break here soon and go get him some of those teeny tiny cupcakes for school and a couple balloons. i know he really doesn't know what is going on.....but I do! :o)

i decided he and I will have a birthday tradition. at 10:07 PM on his birthday he will always get a special gift. :o) as he gets older, it will be the one BIG item that he REALLY wants for his birthday :o) tonight it will just be my little gift to him. :o)
and i have a sneaky suspicion that he will have two birthdays anyway - ha. one with Mommy and the other with Grammy and Papa and family. i mean how exciting - several days of presents is always nice!

we are having his actual birthday PARTY this Saturday and Grammy & Papa's house - so much fun. i really hope the turn out is nice - lots of pictures to put in his baby book and time capsule i am making for him.

as i sit here......i just can not believe a whole year has gone by with this little dude.....i am just amazed at how much he has grown, how much he has changed, and how much he has learned and is still learning.....mommyhood has been so wonderful so far....i constantly look forward to what is next with shnookums....

just 4 more days

just 4 more days

omg! shnookums is going to be a YEAR OLD in 4 days!! i seriously can not believe it.

i spent the past two evenings going through his clothes for the 5th time. i have already given away two humongous bags of his clothes that i could actually part with and not get all emotional about, well kinda....sort of. (yes people, giving away his teeny tiny clothes makes me sad....lol)

as of last night i had 2 more great big bags of clothes that he can no longer wear - i swear i could have my own little baby boy's clothing store with what this little dude had stored away in my closets (yes closets is plural). not to mention all my little teeny tiny pairs of teeny tiny shoes....sigh. and this doesn't even count the big bag of stuff i said i was saving.......whew.

okay, i am snapping out of it.

any how - he is going to be 1 which means i have been post preggy for a YEAR and I still haven't lost any weight. sigh. i know everyone tells me to not harp on it....but it is driving me bananas. i tell you i still feel like the skinny girl i used to be - only a mere 2 years ago....but then i look in the mirror or run out of breath carrying shnookums and the world back and forth when we are out running around etc....and i am reminded----the skinny ME is on vaca. double sigh.
ummmmm hummmmm.....before preggy.....yep - i heard you sigh too. now you know what i am saying? one day i keep telling myself.......ONE DAY........hopefully SOON. i am giving myself to Christmas to get back to a single digit size clothing. at least lose 40lbs....even 30lbs i would feel much better.

okay enough about weight - - back to my babe. :o)

yes, he is becoming such a little man. and to think while i was pregnant i was always trying to imagine becoming a mother and what he would like, and how would it be when i first met him.....well first meeting him was BLISS and totally indescribable. i have said it a 1000 times - i never knew a love like this existed. no matter what kind of day i have - when i see him - it makes me smile and happy and i just want to kiss him all over and make sure he is happy and LOVED.
this was me falling in love. just about to pop - i had to take some pics of my beautiful growing belly with my wonderful blessing growing inside. i can actually say - even with all the "issues" i had while preggy - it was one of the best times of my life - ever! the other time? giving birth to shnookums and holding him and loving him intimately for the very first time.

and here we are......here he is......about to turn 1 years old. he will be an actual number now....not just a week or a month. :o) how exciting - and yet EMOTIONAL. my birthday wish for him is this.....I pray he knows he is LOVED, GODLY, that he is HAPPY, STRONG, HEALTHY, INTELLIGENT, SWEET, RESPECTFUL, SUCCESSFUL, THAT HE CAN DO ANYTHING HE PUTS HIS MIND TO, SAFE, COMFORTABLE, INFINITE BLESSINGS, and just HAPPY.....HAPPY.....HAPPY.....HAPPY.....HAPPY.....etc. and i pray that AB takes NOTICE of him and stops holding grudges, that is heart opens and he finds the love this little boy deserves.

XOXOXOXO PEACE FORWARD ALL!! XOXOXOXO